Say it clearly.
Say it with respect.
Paste a message before you send it — an email to a colleague, a reply in a group chat, feedback for a friend. The checker highlights wording that can sound harsh and suggests calmer ways to say the same thing. Your text never leaves your browser.
Check a message
Message tone checker
It looks for patterns that often make a message land badly: absolutes, blame, sarcasm, shouting and name-calling. It is a second pair of eyes, not a judge.
Swap this for that
Small wording changes that keep your point and lower the temperature.
| Instead of | Try | Why it helps |
|---|---|---|
| “You always forget.” | “This is the second time it slipped — can we set a reminder?” | Describes the event, not the person. |
| “You never listen.” | “I don’t feel heard on this. Can I explain again?” | An “I” statement invites a reply instead of a defense. |
| “Obviously…” | “As I understand it…” | Leaves room for the other view. |
| “Calm down.” | “I can see this matters to you.” | Acknowledges the feeling first. |
| “Whatever.” | “Let me think about it and get back to you.” | Pauses without shutting the door. |
| “Per my last email…” | “Just bringing this back up in case it got buried.” | Same reminder, no edge. |
Why respectful wording works better
People react to how something is said before they process what is said. A message that reads as an attack triggers a defense, and the actual request gets lost. Respectful wording is not about being soft — it is about making sure your point survives the trip to the other person.
Separate the person from the problem
“The report was late” is something both of you can fix. “You’re unreliable” is a label nobody wants to accept. Describe behavior and impact, then ask for what you need.
Watch the absolutes
Words like always, never and everyone are rarely literally true, so the reader argues with the exaggeration instead of the issue.
Give it a minute
If you feel your heart rate going up while typing, save the draft and come back later. Most messages are better for a short pause.
Frequently asked questions
Is my message stored or sent anywhere?
No. The checker runs entirely in your browser; nothing you type is uploaded or saved.
How does the tone checker work?
It looks for patterns that commonly make messages sound harsh: absolute words like “always” and “never”, blame phrasing that starts with “you”, all-caps shouting, stacked exclamation marks, sarcasm markers and insults. Each match lowers the score and comes with a suggestion.
Can it understand context or sarcasm perfectly?
No. It is a simple pattern checker, not a mind reader. Friendly banter between close friends can be flagged, and a polite-looking message can still hurt. Use it as a prompt to reread, then trust your judgment.
Does it work in other languages?
The word lists are English only. Length, exclamation marks and capital letters are checked for any language.
Is this site part of an organization?
No. This is an independent resource site. It is not affiliated with, and does not speak for, any organization, campaign or group with a similar name.
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